When I was on holiday in China, I visited a friend, Julie. We talked about Uni stories overseas and mentioned a friend of us, Ann; A girl lives in Australia. Julie is an amiable lady. After a while, she asked: “Do you have any nice boy for Ann; she’s still single.” Julie used to be the best Uni friend of Ann; indeed, she cares about Ann very much. After I returned to Melbourne, one day, I received a Wechat message from the other Latrobe Uni friend who lives in China. “Do you have a decent single Chinese boy for my friend, a girl in Australia?” “Sorry, I am not surrounded by any Chinese boy in real life, so can’t help.” “Hang on, are single Chinese boys so popular to Chinese girls in Australia? It sounds like they are the Chinese pandas.” “Haha.” Last Saturday, Ann visited me in Melbourne. She showed me a wechat message from a lady in China. “Hi Ann, I introduce you a Chinese boy, he lives in Melbourne.” Ann looked at his photo: “No, he’s not for me, look at his pair of luxury shoes and belt; I don’t think he’s my type, a material man like him.” “Come on, don’t be so picky, you should go and have a look.” I was making a joke. After a while, Ann replied to the lady: “Sorry, I am too old for him.” “How many years older you are?” “A few months.” “Ok, he might need a younger girl.” “You see, now Chinese boys are looking for a younger wife, a girl in 20s is the golden age, she’s very sought after, just like the apartment of Lujiazui (Most expensive CBD in Shanghai).”“Your daughter is supposed to find a husband right now otherwise she will become a suburban apartment in her 30s, which is like me.” “What?” I felt a bit sad. Why so far Chinese ladies are still worried so much about other people getting married, you see, three ladies from China sincerely care about their friends in Australia and trying their best to find the Mr. right for them. I do understand and trust my Chinese friends as they have an excellent husband and lovely children, so they wish their friends could have a good lifestyle which is supposed to have from generation to generation. On the other hand, I believe Ann must be stressed out: “Noo, please don’t care too much about my personal life, I feel perfectly happy if nobody reminds me as a single one from time to time.” That’s the freedom to choose the life you love; when to find a boyfriend, get married and have a kid. In China, a beautiful girl will have enormous pressure when turn to 30, feels like she’s secondhand. Even a girl with a boyfriend will still face a challenge: “When are you getting married?” That’s I’ve heard in my 20s.I was very depressed and gonna kill that colleague who asked me many times a day at the workplace. If I was as brave as I am, I should have told her: “Shut up your mouth, that’s none of your business.” What the hell to do with her, don’t push me to do things I am not ready, that’s my life, please take care of yourself. Eventually, after a lady married, she will be asked: “When are you gonna have a kid?” My mum was hurt as she had me after five years marriage which was abnormal in China. My Grandma wasn’t happy at all with my Mum because she couldn’t have a grandchild on time and there was gossip from colleagues, relatives, everyone worried so much about my mum without a kid. In China, a woman is likely to be considered as inferior if not find a boyfriend, get married or have a kid at a particular time; to be worse, some girls believe they are. My Mum was born in1940s, in 2018, the pressure still exists, how horrible for a Chinese woman!!!! I enjoy living in Australia because there’s freedom to live the way I like and no one ever says anything to me. In my current and previous companies, I haven’t heard Aussies asked unmarried colleagues those stupid questions. In Australia, a person is regarded as very rude who overcares about the life of someone else. One can have lunch at anytime 12:00, 13:00 or 14:00, as long as she feels hungry, it’s insane if one finishes lunch at 12:00, then she persuades a colleague to have it afterwards. Likewise, the marriage. It’s a personal choice. Marriage is such a big thing, which cannot compare with a meal, if don’t feel like and not prepared enough, why getting married? Just because of caring someone else to make them happy so that have to sacrifice yourself, or simply don’t wanna listen to the gossip. That’s very bad. If I am in China, probably ladies will ask: “Does your daughter have a boyfriend?”I know that feeling if I have been asked day in, day out, then I might have to push daughter to find a man get married though she is very young. Fortunately, none of my Aussie colleagues has ever asked that silly question. I also had dinner with an Aussie girl last weekend; she’s in her 30s, I couldn’t tell she stress about to be single as no one ever cares whether she has a boyfriend or not, let alone getting married. Probably one day, she will meet a dream boy at a party held by a friend, and that happens naturally rather than a friend introduce her a future husband on purpose.I believe my Aussie girlfriend must be scared to death, no, no husband at this stage, just be a friend, let’s see what happens. The Aussie girl cares more about the progress than the ending. Life is too short, let’s just experience life and meet the right person, if it fails, try again, why think about marriage at first sight.you are most welcome join my wechat subscription: Englishpassion